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New section No6
“Mama… ndatwite” ! Umukobwa wawe akubwiye aya magambo wabyitwaramo ute ?
Publish Date: mercredi 4 novembre 2015
VISITS :239
By Admin

Kubwirwa ko umwana wawe w’umukobwa w’umwangavu atwite birababaza ndetse bikanatera ihungabana haba ku mubyeyi no ku mwana. Ahanini ibyo biterwa no kuba umwana wari umwitezeho ahazaza heza, kuzana amanota meza mu ishuri, n’ibindi bintu byiza bitandukanye cyane no kumva akubwira ko atwite ,wenda rimwe na rimwe utanamukekeraga ko anafite inshuti y’umuhungu.

Nyuma y’inama zose wamugiriye nyuma yo kugerageza kumurinda akubwiye ko atwite ?

Nk’umubyeyi uzabyitwaramo ute kugirango ubashe gufasha umwana nawe wifashe kwikura mu kibazo neza ?

Banza ubitekerezeho mbere yo kugira ijambo umusubiza : Niba umwana wawe w’umukobwa akubwiye ko atwite banza utuze umwihorere ubitekerezeho neza mbere yo kugira ijambo umusubiza kuko ahanini amagambo ababyeyi bahita babwira abana arushaho kubahahamura. Ikindi uzirikane ko n’ubwo atwite akiri umwana wawe.

Nanone ubaha ubuzima bw’uwo atwite uzirikane ko kumukankamira biza kugira ingaruka kuri abo bombi nawe udasigaye.

Vanessa ni umwana w’umukobwa wabyaye afite imyaka 17 yagize ati  : « Nkimara kumenya ko ntwite narahangayitse cyane mera nk’uwataye umutwe.

Gusa byaje kuba nabi kurushaho umunsi nabwiraga ababyeyi ko ntwite, uwo munsi bahise bambwira nabi bahita banyirukana mu rugo ngo nsange uwa nteye inda ku buryo nashatse guhita niyahura.

Nubwo ababyeyi bageze aho bakandeka nkagaruka mu rugo sindibagirwa uwo munsi banyirukanye bakanga kunyumva kandi aribo nari mfite bo kwitabaza bonyine” Kumwirukana mu rugo bishobora kumuviramo kujya kwiteza uwamuteye inda cyangwa abandi , ikibazo kikarushaho kongera ubukana.

Ihangane ureke kumwereka ko wamurakariye : Nubwo nk’umubyeyi wumva ko ubabaye mu mutima imbere geregeza kwereka umwana wawe ko utamurakariye
Uwamahoro ni umubyeyi ufite umwana w’umwangavu wabyaye afite imyaka 16 yagize ati : “Umukobwa wanjye akimara kumbwira ko atwite nanjye ubwanjye narahungabanye kuko ntanamukekeraga ko byamubaho.

Gusa nabonye kumurakarira byarushaho gukurura ibibazo ahubwo ndamwiyegereza nkamuba hafi. Yamaze imyaka ibiri nyuma asubira mu ishuri, ariko ndakubwira ngo yabaye umukobwa uzi gufata imyanzuro, ubu agira amanota meza kurusha ayo yagiraga mbere”
Ihanganire imyitwarire ye ya cyana igihe atwite  : Umwana ukiri umwangavu iyo atwite agaragaza imyitwarire itandukanye n’iy’umugore mukuru.

Gerageza kumwumva ubyihanganire kandi wirinde kumuhatira kwitwara nk’abagore bakuru ahubwo umugire inama.

Clarisse yarongeye ati  : “ mama yakundaga kumbwira amagambo anca intege ngo sindi umugore sindi ni umukobwa bikambabaza ndetse ugasanga we ashaka ko nitwara nk’abagore bakuru, namubaza uko nakitwara agahita ambwira ngo iyo umuntu atwite agomba kumenya ubwenge !

Mubyeyi, reka nkubwire ko kumuhoza ku nkeke umutonganya atari wo muti w’ikibazo. Ahubwo kumwegera kenshi nibyo bizagufasha kumenya aho yaguye no kumenya uko uzarinda abandi bana niba ubafite.

Mufashe kumenya uko afata neza umwana, hanyuma umutegurire gusubira ku ishuri , umugire inama zihagije zimurinda kongera gusama niba ubona akomeje amashagaga umufashe uko yagera ku buryo bwo kuringaniza urubyaro.

Niba utinya ingaruka zaturuka ku kuringaniza urubyaro , ahubwo mushishikarize ko niba acitswe agomba kujya akoresha agakingirizo kandi nibiba ngombwa utukuhe ajye ATWITWAZA.

umwereke ko uhangayikiye kumufasha akazasohoka mu bibazo arimo. Ntukarakare nk’utazi ko ibibazo bibaho. Gira ukwizera ko bizashira kuko si we wa mbere si n’uwa nyuma bibayeho.

Mufashe kwiyakira no kumva ko ubuzima buzakomeza  : Hari ubwo ababyeyi bananirwa kwakira abana babo bigatuma nabo batiyakira.

Abenshi muri bo niho usanga bahita bajya kwishyingira bakiri bato, abandi bagatorongera bagahunga iwabo.

Nyamara iyo umubyeyi afashije umwana kwiyakira biba n’umwanya mwiza wo kumenya uko uzamurinda mu gihe kizaza kuko iyo umwegereye ari mu kibazo utamurakariye akubwiza ukuri kose ku byamubayeho.
Ntiwibagirwe ko ubuzima bwe n’ubw’uwo atwite bukeneye gukurikiranirwa hafi.

Niba kandi wumva ibyo gukuramo inda nta rubanza bigucira, bimuganirize witonze ariko nakwereka ko atabishaka ntubimuhatire. Kuko uwo ashobora kuba we wenyine ntazabone undi , cyangwa kumukuriramo inda bikamuzanira izindi ngaruka maze byoise akazajya abikugerekaho.

Nihaba gukuramo inda mureke abe ari we ubyiyemerera aho kubimuhatira , kuko ubushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko abakiri bato bakuramo inda bagira ihungabana rikomeye nyuma y’icyo gikorwa kurusha abakuze. Nanone abana bakuriwemo inda bakunda kugira imyifatire itagira rutangira mu bijyanye n’ubusambanyi kuko baba bashize ubwoba.

Ahangaha , ababyeyi bashobora gukeka ko bazaba bashoye abana babo mu busambanyi, nyamara muzirikane ko n’ubwa mbere babikoze kandi ko mutari mwabatumye.

Iyonnye burya ntiyona rimwe , aho kugirango akomeze kurunda abana mu rugo kandi muzi ukuntu kurera birushya, nimumufashe kwirinda gusama kandi muzirikane ko kumufungisha atari byo byiza cyane, kuko numufasha kwifungisha utazaba umufashije kwirinda icyorezo cya sida n’izindi ndwara zandurira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina.

Irinde intekerezo zose zatuma ugira agahinda gakabije : Iyo ugize ikibazo umwana wawe agatwita irinde ibitekerezo bituma ugira gahinda gakabije nko kujya umugereranya naho abandi biganaga bageze, kwicira urubanza ukumva ko hari icyo utakoze gitwita kwe bikaba ari ikosa ryawe, kutishimira umwana azabyara n’ibindi bishobora gutuma ushobora gucikwa ukamubwira magambo mabi kubera intekerezo mbi wagize.

Ku rundi ruhande ntuhishire uwahemukiye umwana wawe akamutera inda imburagihe. Mwegere ubutabera bufashe mu gikorwa cyo kwamagana inkozi z’ibibi zitera abangavu inda.

Gabanya kwiheba uzirikane ko ibibazo biza bihetse ibisubizo. Humura nta mvura idahita.

Mu by’ukuri nta muntu uba uzi nyuma y’ibihe murimo wowe n’umukobwa wawe ikiba kizakurikiraho cyaba cyiza cyangwa se kibi.

Gusa ugomba kumenya ko ugomba kumufasha kandi nawe ukifasha kwakira iby’ababayeho no gukomeza mujya imbere aho kwibanda ku byashize.

M.Fils

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